I was at Café Crema~
having coffee with Emma.
She is one of my dearest friends.
And she said to me~
quite solemnly~
"I'm burning the candle at both ends."
I nodded my head~
and then I said~
"It seems to me that you try forget."
"And so by keeping busy~
you don't have to see~
your life and all its regret."
"You are right." She agreed.
"I have this need~
to ignore my forgotten dreams."
"I have lost all my hope~
and the only way to cope~
is to work my life away, it seems."
I smiled at her sadly~
and said, "It must hurt badly~
to have lost all that you dreamed of."
She laughed most bitterly~
and said, "Don't you see~
I'm not doing what it is I love?"
"All of my life I have prayed~
that if here I stayed~
my dreams would all come true."
"But now I see~
all that's in front of me~
are empty promises and nothing new."
"I am not who I was~
and it's all because~
I had forgotten about Master Time."
"And now I am lost~
and what was the cost?
I have lost all those hopes that were mine."
I took another sip~
and bit my bottom lip~
and then let out a sigh.
"I'm sorry my friend~
that you have seen the end~
when all of your dreams die."
"It happens to us all~
when hopes and dreams call~
and we fail to heed the voice."
"We stand so very still~
while losing our will~
and fail to make the right choice."
"Then we discover~
like a scorned lover~
our hopes are nothing but dust."
"After that we go on~
with a life that is long~
surviving however we must."
Tears streamed down her face~
as she surveyed the place~
and she let the tears fall unrestrained.
And without levity~
she said to me~
"There is nothing worth so much pain."
"To not pursue my goals~
only shows~
what a fool I have become."
I shook my head~
and then I said~
"You are not the only one."
"If you look at me~
you will see~
I have done the same as you."
"I put my dreams on hold~
and now I grow old~
and my hopes are gone nw too."
"So I live with remorse~
that during the course~
of my life, it was lived in vain."
"But I try not to dwell~
lest I find myself in hell~
and end up totally insane."
"Better to get on with life~
despite all the strife~
and ignore all that I've given away."
Emma winced and shuddered~
and said, "Don't you wonder~
what the special is of the day?"
And that was the end~
of this talk with my friend~
about our unmet goals and wasted lives.
We never spoke of that~
again, in fact~
and perhaps that shows we are wise.
But I will say to you~
whatever you do~
make sure you do as you desire.
And do it right now~
and no matter how~
live your dreams or live as a liar.
Copyright © 1999 Heather Bahnmaier. All Rights Reserved.